I am Bipolar. I miss some of those parts of myself.

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​There are some days , I miss my manic episodes, I love how I felt, so excited about everything had the endless energy to start everything I could think of. Then I have to remember that, my mania was lovely while it lasted ,the other side of the coin is the “lows”. Depression anxiety,and hopelessness. When I hit the lows. It didn’t just affect me it affected my family. Being Bipolar , is a daily battle. Thankful found a doctor that actually listened to what I had to say. I hate feeling like I am dependent on medication, but a year later, I know and Feel the difference. The medication does not cure it, it just helps stabilize your mind. Sometimes feeling “normal” makes me sad, but I know it’s for the best. I still struggle from time to time. Day to day. So many peopdont understand mental illnesses, there are people that have legit illness,not just normal mood swings, nervousness, etc.
Days like this,even medicated, it takes so much to keep myself on a balanced. No one really understands. 

Just out of bed , with too many thoughts.

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